Halloween costumes for the practical woman


Maggie Fitzgerald zombie and her trainer.

Last weekend, AKA Halloween weekend number one, I saw some costumes that looked like they were pulled straight from a lingerie department. I was never one of those girls who felt comfortable letting it all hang out in public, so I was a little in awe at what I was seeing. Mostly, I was wondering what these ladies were thinking when they picked out their costumes. Obviously looking good was the number one priority. As a practical, comfort-loving woman, looks aren’t usually the first thing on my mind.

With Halloween just a day away, I’m sure you already have your wardrobe picked out. If you want to rethink your costume, these are some things I ask myself before deciding what to be on All Hallows Eve.

Will I be warm enough?

Halloween costume

Max from Where the Wild Things Are. Full body sweat suit? Yes please.

If you’re going to a house party, staying warm isn’t something you need to worry about. But if you’ll be outside, even just to switch bars, that’s another story. I’m not sure if my blood runs colder than most or if I’m just a wimp when it comes to chilly weather, but being warm is very important to me. I was raised in the frozen tundra of Wisconsin, so “Will you be warm enough?” is a question I was often asked by my mother, and something I now ask myself, before going anywhere after September. Warmth is something I enjoy. A lot. So if you’re looking for me on Halloween, I’ll be the one wearing lots and lots of clothes.

Will I be able to carry all my stuff?

Halloween costume

Look at all that storage space! Plus incredibly warm.

Purses are the perfect solution for this dilemma. But when I go downtown, especially on Halloween, keeping track of a purse is the last thing I want to do. Since the old cleavage storage trick isn’t really an option for me, I need to think about how I’m going to carry my cell phone, credit card and ID without losing anything. Storage is key in my costume choice. This kind of rules out skin-tight outfits… unless a utility belt is involved.

Do I want to attract guys?

Halloween costume

I was a hobbit. A male hobbit. The guys didn’t stand a chance.

Please, ask yourself this question. What is your ultimate Halloween goal? Is it to pick up a guy, or to have fun with your friends? If you’re already taken or just don’t want to be bothered by men, that’s something to keep in mind when deciding on a costume. If you want to drink for free all night, then a sexy costume is the right choice. Since I already have a guy, the attention of other men isn’t something I’m after. My solution is to wear man-repelling costumes. Anything super nerdy (and skin-covering) will do. Or you could dress up like a male character, which is my plan for this year. Yes. I will be a man, and it will be part of a couples costume. Guesses?

Can I have fun in what I’m wearing?

Halloween Costume

Legends of the Hidden Temple contestants. Bonus? Helmets! So much headbutting.

I’m not asking if you can dance without anything ripping or popping out. I’m asking if you can get into character in what you’re wearing. The whole point of Halloween is to be someone/something else, so why not enjoy it? Pretending to be a zombie or a ninja turtle makes for a really good time. Embrace your inner child and have fun with your costume!

Are you dressing up for Halloween this year? Is your costume practical or just really really good looking?


8 thoughts on “Halloween costumes for the practical woman

  1. Great finish with the Legends of the Hidden Temple costume! Also, great, practical list. I am dressing up this year, and one other thing I think about when putting together a costume is, “Can I somehow use this outfit after Halloween?” I’m not a fan (anymore) of buying costume at the nearest Party City or Spirit store. It’s crazy to me to buy a $50 costume only to never where it again. When I try to do my own take on a costume, I buy dresses/shirts/pieces of an outfit that can be versatile to my wardrobe even after the holiday!

    • Yes, great advice! I’m a big fan of finding costumes at thrift stores, but I’m not always the best at finding things I’ll be able to wear again. That is an excellent point. I usually just end up taking the things I’ve bought back to the thrift store once Halloween is over, unless I think I can use it for a different costume another year. Not the most cost-effective, but at least it’s recycling!

  2. Haha, love this! I haven’t dressed up for Halloween in a few years, but one of my main concerns on that day — and every day — is always “will you be warm enough?” (said by my mom’s voice in my head). The best solution I ever had to the carrying-my-stuff issue was when I dressed up as Ariel (as an adult), and my sister made me a Flounder purse! It was awesome. P.S. LOVE the Legends of the Hidden Temple idea.

    • Whaaaaaaaaaaat? A Flounder purse? That is so awesome. I hope you still use it 🙂 And yes Legends of the Hidden Temple was fun! However we could only get three people together to dress up. Not even enough to have one person from each team, haha.

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